Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Home Depot: The Sanctum Sanctorum of Corporate Policy

The Home Depot store located at 500 Clock Tower Way in Crescent Springs Kentucky, 41017 specializes in customer DIS-service. There, I said it; and I meant it.

Last August, some disreputable punk or punks kicked in the back door to a house that I have for sale in Ludlow Kentucky in order to steal the copper pipes from within. This caused about $2000 worth of damage in order to retrieve about $20 worth of copper. I can laugh at these creeps because I would have gladly paid them $50 just to leave my house alone. I guess the joke is on them, isn't it?

By the way, are any of you interested in buying a house?

Anyway, I summoned the police and filed a report, and then went about contacting my insurance company to file a claim. Before the claim could be processed, I needed to have estimates in hand, and since Ludlow is an hour and a half drive from my new home in Lexington, and since about this same time I took a second shift job, the process of obtaining estimates was long and arduous. I had to contact at least a half dozen plumbers before I could finally get one to do the estimate and work.

I made the arrangements for replacing the back door in person at the Home Depot store referred to above during one of my rare return trips to Northern Kentucky. I explained to the salesman my need for the installation of a replacement door, and I emphasized at the very earliest moment that I LIVE IN ANOTHER TOWN AN HOUR AND A HALF DRIVE AWAY; RETURNING HERE IN PERSON IS INCONVENIENT TO ME. It seemed that he understood my point.

It is important to note that the background story to my need to buy a door involved a personally invasive and highly charged emotional experience. I think that the salesman understood this point as well.

To make sure that I was purchasing the correct sized door, it was necessary for the contractor retained by HD to go to my house and take measurements. At first the manager at HD said that it would be necessary for me to be there to open the door for the contractor. I took this opportunity again to emphasize that a round trip of three hours was in convenient for me under the circumstances, and that the house was empty and for sale. The contractor agreed to use the realtor's lock box containing the key to gain entry, and I did not need to make the trip.

When I finally received the settlement check from the insurance company, I first contacted the plumber who gladly came and worked on my house, using the lock box key, at his convenience. I did not need to be personally present in my empty house during this installation, which was great since taking time off work and traveling all that way is such an inconvenience.

Next I contacted Home Depot to schedule the installation of my door. The store first insisted that I pay for the door and service, and after taking my payment informed me that I would need to contact the contractor separately to schedule the installation. I was mildly annoyed that Home Depot did not handle the scheduling, but in my gladness to see a end to this process that was now into its seventh month, I set that annoyance out of my mind.

Within a few days I spoke directly to the contractor, who suggested that the installation could take place between 1:00 and 3:00 on Tuesday, March 16th (yes, that is today as I write this). I said this would be fine, but that since I worked in another city an hour and a half drive away, I could not be there in person. The contractor said this was fine with her.

So I'm thinking this is a done deal. I go away for the weekend to camp in the woods and in the rain and mud for two days. At some point during these two days in the woods, the contractor called again and left a voice-mail.

Essentially her message was that Home Depot had contacted her and advised her that she may not do any work on my house without my being personally present. Recall if you will that I have made it clear at every step in this process that my being present personally is an inconvenience. In fact, it is a hardship. I just started a new job and I do not have the ability to take a paid day off. Attending to this personally means losing a day's pay. Considering that this is a service for which I am paying, for which I have already paid in advance, I do not consider this requirement at all reasonable. But my far deeper concern is that I had already made these arrangements with the contractor who did not object at the time the arrangements were made, and somebody at Home Depot came along afterward and disrupted my plans. The unnamed party at HD who did this acted after I had already paid for this service in advance.

Naturally I saw that the obstacle was at Home Depot, and not with the contractor. So last night I called HD and insisted in a rather urgent and yet professional tone that I was due an explanation and a correction. The manager that I spoke to advised me (get ready; sit down for this)...

...what I was asking for was against company policy.

The rest of this conversation degenerated fairly quickly. The manager claimed that the forms HD uses include a disclosure about having the property owner present during work, to which I replied that they had already waived that requirement by coming out to take the door measurements when I was not there. "Well that shouldn't have happened; against company policy". I pointed out that actually acting in a manner contrary to what one has written down on paper isn't much of a policy, is it? He asked me to (brace yourself) to "work with me" on this. This of course means that I should give in and accommodate their convenience in receiving the services that I have already paid for in advance.

Each passing moment of this conversation intensified my resentment. "I am BITTERLY dissatisfied with the quality of Home Depot's customer service, and I will NEVER do business with your company again" I advised him. "Furthermore, I intend on telling all my friends about my experience, and I have many friends". Now it was his turn to show resentment. He insisted that I was being unreasonable since, after all, this did involve a question of theologically correct corporate policy. And don't forget that the forms had a disclosure and all that.

"The friends I tell won't care or even hear about notes or policies or disclosures" I told him. "They will only hear that I was bitterly dissatisfied, because that is all I am going to tell them".

The idea that I would not act as a fair and impartial advocate on behalf of his employer apparently had not occurred to the manager before I pointed it out, because this was followed by a moment of silence.

"My point in this dispute is that your company took my money and now you are not delivering that which I expect. If your company policy requires you not to deliver what customers expect, perhaps it is not such a hot policy."

This was followed by more babble about taking it to another level of management but it would be to no avail since, after all, this was a company policy and all that. He couldn't understand why I wouldn't agree to driving up after work some day during the week. I pointed out that since I worked until 5:00 each day, a three hour round trip plus three hours of installation time (sitting around in an empty house) would put me back around midnight. Rather than argue, I told him that I could be personally present for the installation anytime next Sunday (incidentally, the reader should take note that I have plans for every Saturday from now until June). Manager said he would investigate that alternative and call me back Tuesday (today; this morning).

A different manager called me this morning. After welcoming me with a "good morning" she advised me that contractors never work on the weekends, especially not Sundays, but that they could make an exception by having someone come to work on my installation on Saturday March 27th. "Will that work for you?"

"No, it won't." Silence. "I have plans to travel out of town that weekend". (Which is true; our family is traveling to Murray to visit the grandparents so that they can celebrate my son's 11th birthday. This has been planned for weeks). There was more silence on the line.

Needless to say, this conversation (during my work hours I might add) did not go any better than the conversation the night before. The only consideration this new manager was able to provide was the telephone number for the corporate offices where I could call to complain (and presumably receive yet another sermon on the sanctity of corporate policies).

In deference to myself (which I think is fair since I am writing this), I have spent the past twenty years as a customer service professional. I demand quality customer service precisely because I deliver quality customer service to my clients.

Several years ago, when I was a brokerage supervisor, I worked for a manager named Dave who I looked to as an exemplar and mentor. Manager Dave once told me, "the customer is not always right; but he is always the customer". I think this is a lesson Home Depot should take to heart.

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